A couple summers ago, our family had a “cousins” reunion over at the farm in Breman. Diane Hilton O’Connor now owns the homestead and has added a beautiful addition next to the historical Hilton salt water farm. We’ve had a lot of family reunions at the farm over the years. My dear Aunt Freda always gave us a good time, usually with lobster and fresh corn off the farm. She cooked most of this feast on an outdoor fireplace under the big trees beside the house. We usually had up to 50 family members attending in those days.
These days, those of us who were little then are now in retirement. The family is aging. We really don’t have too many little ones running around. We are kind of in a transition mode right now. It will take a few more years before all these grandchildren and great-grandchildren start carrying on the name. My sister has two beautiful young grandsons who live on the left and right coasts. She spends her time these days being a Nana and flying back and forth between grandsons.
The family as a whole is very spread out now. It’s rare that we can all accumulate at the same time in one place to visit with one another. The generation above me is gone, on both sides of the family, expect for dear Aunt Virginia Poletti. I am now one of the cousins who are considered the “first generation.” This designation seems strange to me still although the old folks have been gone a while now. It will seem stranger to me in years to come when I have to explain to some little one the relation between them and those old pictures they are looking at in some dusty family album.
Our family is a bit unique because we have double relations. The Sylvester and Emery families are intertwined. Let me explain. The Sylvester-Emery link began when my grandfather, Frederick Sylvester married Ida Emery; while around the same time, Frederick’s sister, Clara, married Ida’s brother, James. You understand that? It is very confusing even to some of us in the family. People we normally called Aunt and Uncle were really cousins removed a couple times. It was so confusing to some of the younger cousins that we just started calling ourselves, “Kissin’ Kousins.” Those two branches spread out as each couple raised a bunch of kids.
The Sylvester side was in danger of dying out unless my father married, because his father died when he was very young. There were other branches of the Sylvester family, but we didn’t generally associate with them. It took a while for the Sylvester side to broaden its family tree. My two brothers married, but Harlan’s son died as an infant. Ted had three sons, two of whom have married and had three more sons between them. So yes, we are getting there.
Over the years, all the kissin’ kousins have done their level best to keep an accurate record of our geneology. Several members make it a hobby. Today our family has many names including: Sylvester, Emery, Tolman, Wass, Gray. My grandmother, Ida Emery Sylvester, remarried and had five more children besides her Sylvester children, my father, Ted, Sr., Frederica, and Ruth.
One of my kissin’ kousins is a mere 26 days older than I. She is the Diane of the Breman farm. We grew up together. Our mothers used to dress us alike. If we were out together and some adult asked us if we were twins, we’d answer, “yes, we’re twin cousins.” In actuality, we really don’t look that much alike. We liked the idea of having a “twin” though. This picture was sent to me recently by Diane. She says we were about four and Diane wasn’t happy because she wanted to hold the book.
Diane is one of my few real “first cousins” by blood. My father, Ted was brother to her mother, Frederica. Whether it was a “kissin kousin” or a first cousin, we’re all one big happy family and we all look forward to seeing what the next generation can add to our heritage.
Thanks for listening.
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